TOP JOKES ABOUT NEYMAR JR

WIKITECH

Top Jokes About Neymar’s Big Money Move To PSG (Get In Here)

• €222m and £515,000 per week.
  I don’t blame Neymar. If it is me, I won’t even tell anybody. They will just see me in PSG’s training.
• Dear FC Barcelona, now that you have €222m for the account. Please do us United fans a favour by buying Courtinho, Hazard and Sanchez.
• My son’s first birthday present will be football. His birthday cake will be football. His bed will be round like football. Even his eba will be molded like football. I can’t take any chances.
• I am angry at the people saying Neymar shouldn’t have left Barcelona because of their history. The A1 I have in history is still in my NECO result doing nothing. Na who history epp?
• Neymar is worth €222m. 1€ is worth 500 Naira. If I am made the CBN governor, I will REPLACE THE NAIRA WITH NEYMAR. Imagine your happiness if you have 1000 Neymar in your account. It will be better than the 1000 Naira remaining in your account right now.
• I am paying 19,000 Naira for a 1 hour seminar because it is titled; “How to be a Neymar in your generation”.
• Many August babies in Nigeria will be named Neymar. Very soon you will start hearing names like Neymar, ChukwuNeyma and Neymaryo.

DELIVERED BY ALFA MUBARAK MOHAMMAD

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RULES TO PLAY FOOTBALL WHEN WERE KIDS JOKES

RULES OF FOOTBALL WHEN WE WERE
KIDS
1. The fat kid was always the goalkeeper
2. The owner of the ball decides who plays.
3. Penalties awarded only if injured player curses a lot.
4. The match only ends when everyone was tired.
5. No matter how many goals you score, the winner will bedetermined by
the last team to score.
6. No referee and lines men. You could run withthe ball even behind the
goal post.
7. If you don't participate in repairing the ball you were given a match
ban.
8. If you're picked last, you're a loser.
9. The guy who's never picked was to fetch the ball from thetree when it
got stuck,under the car or tunnel toplay in the nextgame.
10. When the owner of the ball gets annoyed, game over!
11. You were allowed to change a goalkeeper in case of a penalty.
12. the most skillful player gets automatic selection.

number 12 is on point. even if d he is nt interested in playing, we will start to beg him until he concurs.

MENTAL HOSPITAL

Ofego was being discharged from a Mental Hospital after doctors thought he was finally back to normal. He was put in an ambulance to be taken back home. He claimed he knew the house so he led the doctors. They took him to where he claimed he lived.

Just as they approached a certain house, two kids, dressed in uniforms came out of the house. Ofego
screamed, "Those are my children going to school!"
A minute later, a woman came out of the same house and Ofego screamed, "That's my wife, she is late for work!" This time, the doctors were convinced Ofego was ok and took him out of the ambulance but was still in chains.
Just as they were about unlocking the chains, a man came out of the house and Ofego screamed, "YES! THAT'S ME GOING TO WORK!"  

MIDNIGHT TRIP
A man comes home late at night. Husband shouts behind a locked door: ”Let me in!” Wife: “Go back to where you`ve come from”. Husband:” Let me in, or I`ll kill myself!” Wife: “I don`t care!” Husband goes to a lake and throws a stone into the lake. Wife goes out from a house wearing nothing but bra and pants. She tries to “save” her husband in the lake! Husband sneakily returns to the house and locks the door. Wife returns to the house and finds out that the door is closed. Wife: “Let me in!” Husband:” Tell me, Darling, where have you come from wearing nothing but pants and bra?” Read more: https://www.wikitech303.blogspot.com

THE THREE THIEVES
A judge decides which kind of punishment each thief is about to receive! Judge: “You will get as many years in prison for as many items you`ve stolen.” First Thief: “I`ve stolen a can of sardines I get one year of prison”; Second Thief: “I`ve stolen a tray of eggs, I get 30 years!”; Third Thief: “Why? Why have I stolen a bag of rice?” Read more: https://www.wikitech303.blospot.com